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There are many myth around the “Wedding Night” but most of them have been for gotten or have had a modern twist put on them.
Back in days of yore, your betrothed would take you from the ceremony and reception directly to the bridal boudoir to consummate the marriage. There was no time or need to change into different undergarments. Also, in certain days of yore you needed help to get in and out of your undergarments (hello, lace up the back corsets and layer of underclothing.) Your new spouse would undo your dress and underclothes and you’d make it “official” with your first sexy time. I won’t actually pretend to know all the history of lingerie and days of yore but I DO know that brides today don’t always do this.
In fact, many brides wear a combination of pretty and practical undergarments underneath their wedding gown (hello, Spanx or other bodyshapers + longline strapless bra). These under-items help make your dress look its best, but they may not evoke the sensual feeling you’re looking for once the party winds down and you and your honey go back to the bridal suite.
It’s totally OK to wear what you wore underneath, AND it’s ok to change! You can even make it part of the wedding night fun. In fact, it’s a great time to use that “let me go slip into something a little more comfortable” line. Change into something that makes you feel like a goddess and re-enter the room ready to connect to your love.
Whether or not you’re a virgin when you get married, whether or not it’s your first or fifth marriage, and whether or not you like to wear white – I say wear whatever color you want. This goes for your dress and your lingerie. If wearing white makes it feel more like your wedding night, or you simply like how white makes you feel, then go for it. I did! But if you feel like you’re faking it, or you don’t feel amazing in something white – then don’t wear it. I have so much more to say about this, but it’s really summed up there.
Do you already have a drawer filled with lingerie or sleepwear that makes you feel amazing? Hurray! If something that you already have will help you feel your very best on your wedding night, go ahead and wear it! Maybe it’s the same item you wore when you got engaged. Maybe it’s your lucky chemise. Maybe it’s something you bought years ago and never had an occasion to finally wear. Maybe it’s your favorite item to wear for your honey. Maybe it’s your coziest outfit. Whatever the case may be, if you don’t want to get something new for your wedding night, don’t force yourself to.
And PLEASE, if someone gave you something that says “bride” on the butt or is white and blue but you hate it or it’s uncomfortable, don’t wear it. I repeat: do not wear it! Even if you think “but when else would I wear this?” or “but it’s so bridal!” If it’s not “you”, or you don’t like how you feel in it, don’t force it. Wear what you love to wear. Not just something that you should wear. Always.
A lot of weddings these days are a big, exciting party. And the emotional and physical strain of saying your vows in front of everyone, greeting your loved ones, dancing the night away, and drinking from the open bar can lead to a big crash at the end of the night. Sometimes, there’s just no room in the wedding day for… the wedding night. Even if you and your partner do stay awake long enough to get it on, you still don’t have to wear sexy or bridal-looking lingerie. Cozy up in comfortable pajamas, or the most luxurious pair of sweatpants, or a kaftan and golden slippers. Stay in bed and canoodle, wake up and order room service, or rehash the best memories from the wedding day in something that makes you say hurray – even if it’s not lingerie